Obituary of James T Ruggiero Jr

In each event that we must endure, there is always a lesson to be had if we are open to it, and this one is hard to miss. To love unconditionally and to never take life for granted as tomorrow is never promised. Typically, there is only one spirit we are saying farewell too, but as fate had it my parents were inseparable and were far from typical. The love my parents shared with each other was quite rare. When they were born they began on two separate paths. Along the way on this long and winding road they ended up seeking many different things. One of which is love. In the beginning, it was from Mother & Father, then family, community and so on. In time a void became eminent in each of them which all these forms of love couldn’t seem to fill. Whatever it was their cup was overflowing. Many say they were searching for a suitable soul mate, this may be so but they found much more. According to many myths and esoteric teachings there originally existed one big soul, God, who divided along creation into smaller souls. In the human realm this process led to individual souls for each androgynous being, and finally these souls were divided in two and gained their own consciousness. The flame of God’s oneness flows Within You and Without You; they in time remembered their original state of oneness and searched for each other tirelessly. Twin souls or twin flames are the half souls whom together form a conscious, developed soul. The yin-yang symbol perfectly expresses this eternal attraction of opposite parts, as one recognizes the self in the other one. Jim and Denise genuinely loved each other for who they were, and always encouraged each other to become more than they were the day before. Intertwined will their soul be forever, but let’s not forget the two individuals we loved so much. Radiant, brilliant, witty, and warm, Denise was a woman with more heart and soul than anyone I think I will ever meet. Much of her life revolved around being a natural care-giver so putting those before herself was second nature. When it came to her own children she was more protective than a lioness. In times of strain, she was the backbone of her family making sure always to be five steps ahead of a situation with grace. While Jim was the one you call broken down on the side of the road, it would be Denise you’d call when you were in a jam and needed advice. Her smile alone could bring a smile to yours on a dark day while her hugs brought comfort to your whole being. In any scenario she was always the last one she would take into consideration – her happiness came through the happiness in others. Not only could she do the crossword in the NY Times standing on her head, but any obstacle that was ever put in her way, she would hurdle with ease. I would have loved to have ten minutes in her mind but I believe my head would explode from all of the knowledge. Jim’s laugh was infectious but I believe we will all miss Denise’s home cooked meals just a tad bit more, and if Jim were here he would be the first to say that. After her mother passed if the family was looking for comfort food, their door was always open. Coming from a big family there was always room for guests, she never quite learned the proportions for four…. or perhaps it was intentional. “That Jim Guy” was one of those people with a familiar face. I could list maybe a handful of times that I was with him and he didn’t strike up a conversation with a stranger or ended up knowing someone. From working in the service industry, he was such a people person. Naturally Italians are wonderful story- tellers, as long as you know to stay at least four feet back to avoid the hand gestures. I never minded when he told the same story twice; the fish was always two times bigger than it was the last time I heard it but if ever a life should have a biography written, it would be him. I can only hope to be portray the man behind the stories even half as well as he carried himself. I know that no one will ever forget his infectious hearty laugh. It could be recognized in a room full of people. His presence alone could sway the energy of an entire room and guaranteed to raise a smile. With every joke, even if they weren’t that funny, you couldn’t help but chime in to him cracking himself up. Jim was a family man; he always put his wife and kids first. When I heard his heart was healthy and normal, I was shocked… I wasn’t sure that a person could hold that much unconditional love without damage. He confidently and proudly wore his heart and soul on his sleeve, willing to give the shirt off his back to anyone in need. Summers were spent at Seaside, while Sundays were devoted to riding. Jim loved the view from his handle bars with Denise looking beautiful as ever sitting on the back. When they would get to a stop light, he would ask her “which way” and they would get lost together… but he always found the way home without stopping for directions! Let’s not forget his mechanical genius. He could hear the sound a car made and have five hypotheses if he didn’t already pinpoint it. Whether it was for a shoulder to cry on, a friend to cry with, or an ear to listen he was always there with open arms and endless words of wisdom. This tragedy brings with it an untold amount of heartbreak, but we know that is the opposite of what they’d want. They were both loved more than they could ever have imagined and they loved just as hard. When that song comes on the radio, they are dancing for you… dance and sing with them. When you go out on your bike, they are riding with you leave enough space for them. Whenever you think of them, they are wrapping their arms around you. All of these memories that flood in are their way of saying they love you. In times like these we cannot focus on the loss, we need to celebrate the times had. You've endured the heavy load on the Long and Winding Road. My sweet Lord, Here Comes the Sun, may you and Denise ride on to Strawberry Fields Forever as you both lived and taught us... All you need is LOVE. Hoping we can all feel the sun and find a way to share your legacy of love, it is truly all we need isn't it? Leaves are falling all around, It's time I was on my way. Thanks to you, I'm much obliged for such a pleasant stay. But now it's time for me to go. The autumn moon lights my way. For now I smell the rain, and with it pain, and it's headed my way. Sometimes I grow so tired, but I know I've got one thing I got to do... Ramble On, And now's the time, the time is now, to sing my song.